Friday, March 14, 2008

In Which This Blog Loses the Support of the Gun Lobby

I understand the logic of this law, really I do, and not just because I was born and raised in Oklahoma:

Legislation that would allow concealed weapons on college campuses in Oklahoma was approved by the state House Thursday despite opponents who said putting more guns on campus makes no sense following recent massacres at Virginia Tech and Northern Illinois University.
The logic, which I again understand, is this: if the multiple killings on the campuses of Virginia Tech and Northern Illinois University taught us anything, it's that the gun-wielding sociopaths weren't worried enough about gun-wielding regulars. They plotted their multiple killings expecting that they'd be the only armed people around, and that after killing dozens of students, staff, faculty, and bystanders, they'd return to their soiled apartments in perfect peace, giggling to themselves and gobbling down a candy bar they didn't even pay for. And that's exactly how it turned out for them, right? They're all about rational planning, those gun-wielding sociopaths.

The argument goes on to say that guns are just another potentially deadly tool, like pitchforks, hoes, backhoes, fishing hooks, cheese graters, nitro-burning funny cars, horseshoes, anvils (cf. Wile E. Coyote cartoons), yardarms, dogs that were abused as puppies, baseball bats, golfing cleets, bowling balls, extension cords, bricks, bottles, sacks of concrete mix, and eyeglasses (cf. Godfather Part III). There are a million forms of death-by-tool, so why single out guns? What next? Yardarms banned from college campuses? Then only the criminals will have yardarms.

What's done is done. Henceforth, if a crazy person opens fire on a college campus in Oklahoma, he can be certain of return fire.

Another problem solved.

(H/T Chubbs)

3 comments:

mikesdak said...

I must say I'm not against the idea of responsible people carrying guns,but we know this will let anyone have one, and I knew a fair number of people in college who probably shouldn't have been using eating utensils without supervision,much less packing heat.
The tooth-and-nail opposition to ANY restriction on who can have a gun is where the gun lobby loses me.

Chubbs said...

I think it's interesting that the original version of the bill gave the conceal and carry right to any person over 21. Now it's largely limited to military personnel and veterans. Given the thousands of soldiers, airmen, sailors, and marines returning from Iraq and Afghanistan with PTSD and other mental disorders, and in light of "patriotic" veterans like Tim McVeigh and John Allen Muhammad and the low priority this administration places on veteran health care, I'm not sure I would feel any safer on a college campus. And how high has the suicide rate risen among military personnel and veterans since we invaded Iraq?

Dale said...

Right-o, Chubbs and Mike. At the risk of disappointing ... um, I'm not sure who exactly ... I have to admit I just don't "feel" the gun control debate. The NRA doesn't throw me into a rage, nor do their opponents. I don't hate guns and I don't love them. I certainly can't relate to the people whose fundamental political axioms center on gun ownership. Those people should be shot! Not really.

I definitely think it's reasonable to keep guns and crazies away from one another. While solving anxiety disorders, depression, schizoid dimentia, PTSD, and similar conditions is not amenable to easy answers, I will go out on a limb and say that handing these people a gun is not a promising cure.