Monday, August 4, 2008

Hail Tire Gauge

Until something more hideous and insipid comes along, it's the tire gauge. The tire gauge is the synecdoche of the political hour, that which brings vividly to mind the downside of giving a shit about politics and public policy.

It shouldn't be long before something even more insulting to our collective intelligence rolls along, but for now, at this moment, caring about politics entails the spirited taking of sides on whether properly-inflated tires increase fuel efficiency or not. And whether properly-inflated tires are part of a well-formed energy conservation diet. And whether the august stage of US presidential politics is the proper place to address the question.

So, for the sake of the blush on every child's cheek, let's get this one right, lest we fail our higher angels and betray our most hallowed ideals:

Of course, Obama never said proper tire pressure would “break our dependence on Middle Eastern oil.” Some of McCain’s highest level supporters — Govs. Arnold Schwarzenegger (R-CA) and Charlie Crist (R-FL) — also agree with the value of inflating car tires properly:
He never said that. Even Republicans like Schwarzenegger and Crist have, in their time, spoken favorably of properly-inflated tires. Yes, even they!

In moments like these, I understand the pull of apocalyptic religion.


Sis B said...

It makes me happy to read the word "synecdoche."

I am so very glad that everyone can reach across the aisle on the issue of proper tire inflation. I feel safer now.

Dale said...

Sis B, I don't just feel safe, I feel pride in country right about now. I'm completely full of it, in fact.