Wednesday, September 24, 2008

For Fortified Parody

Here are a few examples of Roger Ebert's recent attempt to parody the claims of creationism:

Q. Was there a Noah, and did he have an Ark?

A. Certainly. There are many unverified reports of a massive wooden vessel on Mount Ararat. The Arc contained eight people, from whom we are all descended. It also contained two of each kind of animal. Since living species were obviously not created through an evolutionary process, every surviving land-based mammal species (about 5,400) had both ancestors on the Arc.

Q: What about dinosaurs?

A. They walked the earth at the same time as man, but were wiped out by the Flood, whose turbulence buried their bones in non-sequential sediments.

Q. What did the creatures on the Ark eat?

A. Food on board, fish, and possibly trapped sea birds.
Notice anything? Yea, me too -- and so did PZ Myers -- a parody collapses when there are millions and millions of people who take it straight. Sadly, millions of people actually believe every word Ebert typed in that parody.

You'd think a professional film cricket critic of many years and good standing would be past this point; surely Roger Ebert is aware of the continuing viability of the careers of Michael Crichton and Michael Bay, among others. How many Pirates of the Carribean films until Roger Ebert realizes that people are willing to swallow almost anything?

And does he realize, for that matter, that George W. Bush is still the president, that Sarah Palin stands a very good chance of becoming the next vice president, and that we as a country are about to hand nearly a trillion dollars to a Secretary of the Treasury so he can dole it out to welfare recipients with Wall Street addresses?

Parody has to be made of stern stuff these days.

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