Thursday, December 18, 2008

Moderates Who Aren't: Rick Warren

Well-fed Christianist pastor Rick Warren can certainly dance. He was vocally supportive of California's prop 8, which destroyed same-sex marriages in his home state; and here he is correcting his original dodge of a straightforward question about civil unions:

But a civil union is not a civil right. Nowhere in the constitution can you find the "right" to claim that any loving relationship identical to marriage. It's just not there.
If you're scoring at home, that's a double bonus load of batshit: first, he's unambiguously against civil unions even though they don't involve the precious word marriage and therefore don't threaten to "redefine" it; and second, he hews to a theory of constitutional jurisprudence under which the enumeration of certain rights in the constitution is construed to deny and/or disparage other rights not so enumerated. Whereas the ninth amendment to the US Constitution states:
The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.
So I gather former constitutional law professor Barack Obama wants to be seen as "reaching out" to bigots who consider the Constitution as optional, perchance as toilet paper. Or perhaps Rick Warren knows that the ninth amendment was metaphorical? (More on his powers of metaphor divination later.)

Warren's verbal dancing continues:
BELIEFNET: What about partnership benefits in terms of insurance or hospital visitation?

WARREN: ... I favor anyone being able to make anyone else the beneficiary of their health or life insurance coverage. If I am willing to pay for it, I should be able to put a friend, partner, relative, or stranger on my coverage. No one should be turned away from seeing a friend in the hospital. But visiting rights are a non-issue in California! Since 1999, California has had a domestic partnership law that grants gay couples visiting rights and all the other rights. Prop 8 had no -zero -effect on those rights.
How generous! Rick Warren wouldn't cancel or re-write existing insurance contracts if he had the opportunity, even if their terms were found to bind icky gays. And that part about what proposition 8 didn't do to rescind existing rights of hospital visitation is simply precious in its combination of evasiveness and defensiveness. Quelle surprise that Matt Nisbet should adore his brand of not-moderate-at-all moderation.

Careful students of Rick Warren shall forever treasure this line:
I've eaten dinner in gay homes.
This leads us all to ask, perhaps for the first time: am I living in a gay home? Were any of my former homes gay? Not to mention: what about lunch and brunch? Has Rick Warren eaten brunch or lunch in any gay homes? Supper? Breakfast? Nighttime snack? I do hope so. I do. So much depends on it.

Delving further into Rick Warren's fascinating and oh-so-moderate view of all things heavenly and earthly:
The Designer of sex has clearly and repeatedly said that he created sex exclusively for husbands and wives in marriage. Whenever God's parameters are violated, it causes broken hearts, broken families, emotional hurt and shame, painful memories, and many other destructive consequences. There would be so STDs in our world if we all played by the rules.
And thus we have confirmation, if we needed it, that STDs -- AIDS but not only AIDS -- result from human sin. If people would just eat dinner in gay homes and stop the icky gay sex and cease the extra-marital screwing, STDs would vanish. (In fairness, the nature and origins of disease is entirely a bull-session abstraction with no real-world consequences, so why pester the well-fed pastor over it?)

Lest we forget, Pastor Rick Warren denies evolutionary science in favor of bronze age fable:
If you're asking me do I believe in evolution, the answer is no, I don't. I believe that God, at a moment, created man. I do believe Genesis is literal [sic], but I do also know metaphorical terms are used.
And you need not even ask: he knows exactly which parts are metaphorical and which parts are to be taken literally. This is an entailment of knowing that metaphorical terms are used.

Thanks, Barack Obama, for inviting this sack of crap to join you on the stage to pray over your inauguration. I can see less reason than ever for having bothered to vote for you over that Bush-miming dotard and his hick Alaskan girlfriend.

3 comments:

Laura said...

Dale, I know what you're saying. But he's not going to do everything right. Let this be his worst mistake.

Dale said...

Laura, I hear you. I'm not ready to throw Obama under the bus (so to speak) quite yet, but this does aggravate me. As with FOXNews, Rick Warren should have to prove his most self-serving pretensions, and he's a good long way from that. He is not a moderate just because he calls himself one, just as FOX is a propaganda arm of the GOP despite whatever its flacks and whores prefer to claim.

Laura said...

Agree and agree. But let's not forget that one of the great things about Obama is his ability to 'reach across the aisle' and unify the country, not to mention trying to restore global relations. If it means throwing a bone to the so-called religious moderates, I can live with that.

Obama is a very intelligent man. In his heart of hearts, I doubt he really believes any of it, but he doesn't want to alienate the large portion of the country, or the world for that matter, who still hold on to their supernatural beliefs. Maybe a nod to RW is a step in that direction.