Sunday, May 24, 2009

Terminator 4: Rise of the WTF?!?

I watched the new, widely-panned Terminator film earlier today and I doubt I have enough information to form the basis of a review, even the kind of half-assed review that occassionally fleshes out the pixels of this precious, precious blog.

To put it briefly, I didn't get it. I didn't follow the plot. I'm not making any sort of high-minded criticism of the presentation, such as calling attention to continuity problems or finding characters' motivations uncredible (though that would be easy enough in this case); it's rather that I didn't understand the story on the most basic level. I have tried to reassemble the sequence of events depicted and implied in whatever the hell I saw today, but to no avail.

I'll grant it looked really cool in spots: a few scenes were genuinely thrilling and came respectably close to showing us action sequences that we haven't seen a dozen times before.

One would think Christian Bale would have reserved a potentially career-defining tantrum for the set of a better film than this, but I suppose one must fly into rages on the sets of the shitty films we have, not those we wish we had.

Whatever.

2 comments:

Reuben said...

Dale, though I have not seen the film myself, I recommend the following timeline over at cracked.com, which assembles all four films into one very unhelpful timetravel diagram. Good luck!

http://www.cracked.com/topic/254-the-terminator/

Dale said...

Reuben, thanks. At least I can dismiss my working hypothesis that the movie didn't make sense to me because I'm a lazy dumbass. This is not to say I am without lazy dumbass qualities, but it's not the best explanation here. Whew.