Friday, October 16, 2009

Jesus Christ, Put Down That Dinosaur

With Jesus sequestered away in his heavenly attic loft hugging dinosaurs and such, won't someone please think of the children?

Maybe. A definitely-not-racist official of Tangipahoa Parish in Louisiana has answered the call:

Bardwell told Hammond's Daily Star newspaper that he was concerned for the children who might be born of the relationship and that, in his experience, most interracial marriages don't last.

"I'm not a racist," Bardwell told the newspaper. "I do ceremonies for black couples right here in my house. My main concern is for the children."

Bardwell, stressing that he couldn't personally endorse the marriage, said his wife referred the couple to another justice of the peace.
All of that sounds great until we learn that Bardwell's wife just passed the couple down the road to another, less vigilant official who allowed their doomed union to go forward. Oh, the fecklessness of man!

The conclusion is every bit as inescapable and firm as Bardwell's non-racist-ness and "the new South's" newness: for the sake of the children, Jesus needs to leave the celestial petting zoo, return to earth, and do what's necessary to keep the races properly separated.



(image fetched here, though I strongly doubt it originated there)

2 comments:

Rodney Howard Browne said...

“Peace, be still!” and the wind obeyed. I want you to know, He can still calm the storms in your life! It doesn’t matter what your storm looks like. It doesn’t matter what you’re facing. Jesus still calms the storm for you.

larryniven said...

Actually, this calls to mind an old philosophical puzzle. Can you act in the best interests of a tragically mixed-race child who doesn't yet exist, or is it only possible to act morally towards actual tragically mixed-race children? Whatever the answer, surely we should congratulate this man for the bravery required to admit to his views in public.