Saturday, December 12, 2009

Jennifer Connelly at 39

I want to extend happy birthday wishes to Jennifer Connelly, who turned 39 today, the day on which I was, quite by coincidence, first exposed to the glaring shortcomings and talent-wasting realities of the 2008 remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still, a terrible film that has no reason to exist.

Connelly's IMDB profile includes the following detail that is too deliciously perverse not to include in the annals of this precious, precious blog: the actress

[c]ut a single in Japan, which she sang in phonetic Japanese. She says her agent made up the idea that she is semi-fluent in the language.
Of all the things the parents of Jennifer Connelly pictured for their newborn in the closing days of 1970, was singing in fraudulent Japanese at the behest of her money-grubbing handlers among them? I think I know the answer, but I can't be sure.

Most of us don't have agents pressing us, for pecuniary reasons or other reasons, to pretend we know, or can sing in, a language we don't actually know well enough to sing in. Then again, if it came in trade for being paid monstrous sums of money for appearing in shitty feature films and being one of the most beautiful people on the planet, it might not be so awful. I've heard of uglier fates.

It should be noted (for purposes of this blog post) that the production of The Day the Earth Stood Still made a go at being 'green':
To prevent the wasting of paper, concept art, location stills, and costume tests were posted on a website created by the production for crew members to reference. Costumes were kept for future Fox productions or given to homeless shelters, rather than thrown away. Hybrid vehicles were used and crew members had orders to turn off their car engines if they sat in their vehicles for more than three minutes.
Now, I'm ever more sure I'm vindicated in my offline arguments to the effect that some the costumes seen in the control room scenes of The Day the Earth Stood Still were re-used by Fox in subsequent episodes of American Dad.

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