Thursday, December 2, 2010

Greetings from Poxy

Both readers of this precious, precious blog, please note that I am ill. Yesterday I came down with some kind of stomach flu / avian flu / swine flu / salmonella infestation / anthrax / radiation poisoning / feline leukemia (that was the cat's opinion) / gawd knows that had me lying motionless on a reclining chair, feverish and achy, with barely strength enough to lift and operate a TV remote control with which I sampled daytime programming whose quality made me wish the pox would take me.

While I'm on that: how many goddamn cooking programs are there? Apparently there are enough of them to justify entire cable networks. I am so glad I am paying for a bundle of cable channels from Crimecast that includes so much programming aimed at people who wish to spend hours each day preparing meals, and hours more watching television learning how to spend those hours. If that's you, live long and prosper and so on, but I would rather eat raw tree bark and crap out splinters.

As I have noted before, other people's avocations are stupid.

Anyhoo, Wilbur the cat was kind enough to perform a reenactment of me from yesterday (pictured). He plays this role frequently, it turns out.

Today is quite a bit better, but I am still not well.


Sean G said...

I hope you weren't seated sideways.

I've never understood the appeal of cooking shows either, since recipes are available pretty easily on the internet (and are much easier to refer to in a timely manner) and watching other people cook things that are better than what I eat just makes me jealously hungry.

Then again, I stream poker programming online, so maybe I'm not one to scoff at "boring" television.

Paul Sunstone said...

Sorry to hear you're ill, Dale. I hope you get better soon. Either that, or can I have your blog after you pass on?

Domestically Challenged said...

Food Network taught me to cook. Like, 6 yrs ago I used to burn noodles, and now I cook completely scrumptious meals from scratch. Hubs is forever grateful for all the cooking shows I have watched over the years.

Cook books have recipes, but the shows actually teach you to COOK. They teach technique that books can't express... and shockingly technique makes a big difference in the taste and texture of ones dish! They also teach how to think about foods and how they go together, layering flavors and textures to create something really WOW!

I have NO LIFE! *head to keyboard*

Dale said...

@DC, ha! Of course you have a life.

You make excellent points. I can see there would be a vast difference between reading a recipe and watching someone cook --- after all, most people have learned to cook by watching someone cook and hearing them talk about it.

Cooking is like so many things in life --- I am glad there are people who can do it well and who take an interest in it. I'm just not one of them.

You watch all the cooking shows for me, and I'll watch all the shows where old guys argue about football for you. Or some of them. Deal?