Wednesday, July 13, 2011

The Onrushing Maw

As it happens, in that same filmspotting podcast I was caterwauling about yesterday, Matty Robinson had positive things to say of -- of all things -- Paul Blart Mall Cop, the Kevin James vehicle set in a mall in which a man (who is, you see, funny because he is fat) re-enacts the slapstick crime-busting antics that were already agonizingly tedious ten minutes into Home Alone. After which something something he gets the girl --- or we should say, the attractive girl is saddled with the character played by Kevin James, including all his ravenous insecurities and dawning medical infirmities.

Granted, for all that, PBMC is slightly more endurable than Congo, but with the prospect of The Zookeeper darkening our collective near futures, can we afford to permit a positive mention of the film oevre of Kevin James? I say we cannot.

Fortunately, as the image to the right illustrates, Jeffrey Sconce is already doing more than caterwauling --  he has situated The Zookeeper in the context of Biblical preachments, and has provided a helpful Zookeeper Checklist for those sad sacks who have been conked out and dragged to a showing of it.

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